Greetings Race Fans!
You find the Jonesey Racing Team on their annual holiday in Portugal where I had hoped to be spending my time at Estoril but instead all talk of motor racing has been banned.
Even worse after praying for rain at the races I find my prayers have now been answered and the rain is falling not just on the plain but also on me.
As I tried to put thoughts of the ageing MG gently dripping fluids onto the garage floor behind me I was devastated to discover a relative of one of the racing teams is performing in the hotel each night.
Dave Neaves plays piano says the poster! I could tell he was related as he starts off very slowly during practice and then half way through the tune he really puts his foot down until he skids off his piano stool at the end!
Anyhow, back to the racing as the time fast approaches for the Silverstone Dead or Alive Meeting.
As usual a massive entry has been received for the PBIC and Class B is currently showing 16 entries on their own….at this rate they will soon need a separate race for themselves.
A few familiar and some unfamiliar faces are making an appearance this year.
S/S Live sees the return of former Clockwork Orange owner Paul Rayment in his MGF Cup car. Not sure if this is going to be a regular competitor with us or if he’s just shaking it down in readiness for next year’s season in the Trophy Series, but he is expected to be quick following the sale of the Orange to the man known only as Wilson.
Also sees the return of Andy Young in the notorious MGC. Those of us in the slower classes (which will be all of us I imagine) will need to keep an eye on our rear view mirrors…..unless the much threatened ballast has been added ay Andy?
Incidentally I hear there will be a mobile rolling road at the track….now wouldn’t it be interesting to have the cars checked out and see what power they really are running???? I am happy to be the first one tested but I reckon I might be the only one to turn up!
Team Neaves have entered three cars but it remains to be seen if the brothers Grim will be able to resolve their clutch problems and also take their towing tests, buy tow-cars and then buy trailers…..hmm.
Paul Rigg will be debuting his Metro and Margaret will be out in the MGF….so who will do the race report I ask?
Ewart Kitson returns in the ZS after the engine blow up earlier in the year and Lew Bergonzi buoyed with his victory at Brands has splashed out his Cold Weather allowance on a Silverstone entry.
Burchill and the Loony self publicity team have been at work with a nice article in MGE Mag this month…it was nice as there was no picture of Blagger Burchill in it.
In light of the excellent response received to the Blaine Neaves / Rod Stewart Special which seemed to strike a chord with everyone (how do I do it I hear you ask) and in keeping with the Dead or Alive Theme (You spin me round like a record etc), I have decided to do yet another special & compile a Pop Top Ten for the drivers;(well I got to thirteen but will leave the rest to you lot).
So as Doom cranks up the gibber-o-meter, and in no particular order here they are:
1. Simon Cripps – Rocket Man (40)
2. Dave Brooke - Long haired lover from Liverpool (11)
3. Pete Burchill - Slow boat to china (13)
4. Alan Jones - What estate I’m in …is that a real record? (45)
5. Michael Piggot - Jake the Peg (60)
6. Simon Tinkler - Mellow yellow (18)
7. John Wreck-it. - I love the sound of breaking glass (5)
8. Pete Bramble - How low can you go (69)
9. Barry Holmes - The dove from above…not a record but you see where I’m going with this (37)
10. Dan Ludlow - Anything by Sandy Shaw (70)
11. Blaine Neaves - Bob the Builder (7)
12. The Everley Brothers (Dan & Ollie) – Happy Trail(er)s (3/4)
13. Weasley You spin me round
And finally…Until we meet again (Vera Lynn) at Silverstone, I thought I’d end with a proverb this month, so here goes:
The grass is always greener of the other side of the track. (This will require the introduction of the obscure-o-meter I think)
Jonesey







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53 visitors commented in " Pre-Silverstone Report June 2009 "
Follow-up comment rss or Leave a TrackbackHave a good break mate relax enjoy the sunshine.
Does anbody want to put a team together for the intermarque race, as left it a bit late for the enduro on satuday.
Tim Lewis will be int he sadle of Car13 for this event.
220 for 30 minute race amkes it worth the weekend
Thanks
Pete
Good report again Jonesey, got us all In The Mood (hey another song, but probably only Lew will remember that one). The song for my Metro is Kylie’s Can’t get you out of my Shed. It’s broken and in pieces, it will remain in pieces in my shed, garage, garden, loft etc. for some time. Steve Carr’s software refuses to recognise this fact and I’m getting into the routine now of ringing him on the closing day to remind him I’ll be in the MGF.
Has anyone seen a long range forecast for Silverstone, will we be Walking On Sunshine or need an Umbrella-ella-ella?
Metcheck suggests rain all weekend, however it is a few weeks away so it may change.
Gibber-O-Meter Level 1 (Low) - Go about your business as normal.
Confucius say: - Man with big enough tank slapper see grass (Armco, marshalls post, etc) on both side of track.
Rolling road Mr J!!!!! Would that be one of those pointed comments???????
Pitlane gossip: -
Wilson has decided to repaint the Clockwork Orange…….. After much debate it has been decided to paint it BMC Blaze Red (BLVC16 apparently).
Mr Jones,
No JW related song !!
Perhaps this will help you http://www.lyricsdepot.com/
See you all soon.
Dave
Far be it from me to make pointed comments LOD!
I was going to include some Michael Jackson songs in my Dead or Alive report…..perhaps it’s just as well I did’nt….
I am sure we can come up with a song for Dr Evil….any suggestions folks?
If any of you remember the Save Croft Petition here is the Government’s unsurprising response:
http://www.number10.gov.uk/Page19765
As the response to find a song for JW is proving a bit sluggish…(if only the same could be said for on track)…how about
“(I’ve got a brand new) Combine Harvester” by The wurzels?
Gibber-O-Meter Level 1 (Low) - Go about your business as normal.
Where are they all then Mr J? I hope you haven’t upset them all with the rolling road snipe!!! Even Junior is low profile. He’s probably dreaming up another mod to Miss Daisy to give the Scruts something to complain about.
I can only presume either the heat’s got to them or they are watching that personable Scottish chap batting a ball about.
If I can run this in class B on treaded tyres I might just take my chequebook to Silverstone…..
http://www.coys.co.uk/auctions/lot.php?auction=90&id=56624
Im sure you could run it in class b. I mean it is a MG , And who really cares about power weight and tyres?
I have heard that some series have such a thing as an eligibility scrutineer….whatever that is?
eligibility, well it has wheels a engine and makes the right noise,that being the case surely it must be able to fit somewear in the pbic
As long as it is not fitted with a dry sump system, and only has five forward gears…..
Dave
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Ex-works-MG-ZR-endurance-race-car-rolling-shell-rally_W0QQitemZ160345736472QQcmdZViewItemQQptZAutomobiles_UK?hash=item255559c518&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14&_trkparms=65%3A12%7C66%3A2%7C39%3A1%7C72%3A1683%7C240%3A1318%7C301%3A1%7C293%3A1%7C294%3A50
Want to win class C then this little baby may be of use, contact sandbag ludlow, sport and racing endurance car
As it happens I could use a little sand for my patio….wonder if anybody has some to spare?
There seems to be something missing from that ebay item.
Oh yes, the engine! Now where might that be….?
Dave
I want that ZR!, suppose I better try to actually race the car I have first though.
In usual Team Neaves fashion, none of our cars are ready. We are considering cutting holes in the footwells and attempting a Fred Flintstone type arrangement.
Hi Jonesey, Church Lane Racing are planning a 2 car entry at Silverstone. Simon will be driving Primrose and Peter is 1st Reserve entry with the Wilsher MGB. So watch out Class B!! This car is seriously quick.
In the words of Ron Gammons “Why do I bother?”
So we have reserves now! Not content with already having the larget grid (by some margin) we have too many…
I’m throwing down the gauntlet by putting the Metro on the rolling road at Silverstone - let’s see who really has least power!
Jonesey - “Why do I bother?”
Because you love the attention….?
At least we seem to have registered on the Gammons radar.
Gammons has got radar???
I’d like to see those comments…
Peter Andrews now a confirmed entry, that is if Rob Huff leaves the car intact after Saturday’s race. Don’t worry Class B & others, Peter will not be competing for Championship points.
It’s not the points … it’s Peter’s grinning face as he goes past that really winds me up!!
Vic Reeves indeed…..to be fair, a total stranger did actually shout out “Oi Vic!” from the other side of the road whilst I was on holiday in Spain last year. I suppose I should be grateful he didn’t shout out “Oi Peter Beardsley…..”
I look forward to having the best seat in the house for the upcoming V8/MGC showdown at Silverstone, I know who my money will be on. My video of the event will be a classic, (available at all good newsagents, to the left of Readers Wives)
Vic
With Pete in class B will he act as the hare to tow Simon round to a faster time?
Jonesey, not seen Safety Fast this month yet then?
No I have’nt…nor have I got any S/Stone tickets yet…do you think my postie is intercepting my mail?
No need for a tow, we have the Vic Reeves Appreciation Society scattered evenly throughout the field, who have been instructed under deep hypnosis by my good self to enter into what can only be described as “tactical driving” techniques.
They can easily be spotted as the shifty looking drivers practicsing “shadow boxing” routines in the holding area, and later exchanging what can only be described as masonic (or moronic?) handshakes with each other.
You must appreciate, they cannot be held responsible for their actions, & if quizzed at a later date, are programmed to answer only “well he souldn’t be in that class anyway Ron….”
Vic
The sudden arrival of Vic Reeves as a contributor to this site is making me feel quite dizzy…
yep, my head is spinning…
Be careful Dan, one day you three may also turn into my V8 disciples (if you can’t sort out those dodgy K series beasts)
Did you ever meet the wife?
http://www.virginmedia.com/images/vic-reeves-431×300.jpg
Jonesey,
Your postie probably only has Safety Fast since tickets for MGLive seem to be conspicuous by their absence. One or two comments on mg racing related sites about where are the tickets….
Submit a comment and what happens?
Delivery of tickets and passes this morning.
Dave
Gibber-O-Meter Level 2 (Medium) - Excerise caution (avoid people in Nomex).
Splendid, its nice to see some of the grid have finally woken up, (or back from holiday).
The Vic Reeves bit has really boosted the Gibberish reading - I’m suprised there has been no mention of the PBIC very own racing weight George Dawes.
I’ve got my Silverstone tickets - Now all I want is the latest issue of Safety Farce for my MGCC membership card!
Weather for Sunday is improving (if you can believe Metcheck) - It was forcasting moderate rain, but now is predicting damp practice and a dry race.
However, for those camping!!!!!!!
See you there.
Gibber-O-Meter Level 1 (Low) - Go about your business as normal.
Damn, the weather report thing has dropped the gibberish level back to Low. That will teach me to be useful and factual.
Factual perhaps……useful?
Rumour has it that Team Neaves transport problems could soon be (R)over….
I also hear that Sandbag has offered to buy a few beers on Saturday night after his little windfall….(terrible things these rumours)
I’m now intrigued as to the full Gibber-O-Meter scale?
Also interested to see that the glazing business is proving profitable….
Jonesey for ever looking for a beer
hopefully it will stay dry
The Church Lane Racing Bongo has expired with a cracked cylinder head! Our opinion of Japanese reliability has taken a dive. There is a chance it will be fixed but Simon has his Mondeo in reserve. so, hospitality may be a bit restricted but we will do our best.
Peter has promised not to go faster than Rob Huff in the BCV8 race, so he may have some reserve to tow Simon!
Gibber-O-Meter Level 1 (Low) - Go about your business as normal.
The full scale Gibber-O-Meter reading is Level 5 (Armagedon) - Abandon all hope of intelligent conversation ever again!
This level has been carefully calculated on the previous Jonesey Racing best of a 15 message thread of un-motorsport, un-MG, un-MGCC, un-PBIC related nonsensical gibberish.
This normally takes the form of name calling, finger pointing, general p~ss taking, etc.
Great ain’t it!
Nice to see Team Miss Daisy has finally reappeared - What have you got planned to upset the officials at Silverstone?
Too deep for me…..
Is that level 5 as in “Armageddon out of here”?
Jonesey’s pre-emptive rain dance seems to be paying off!
I think I started my rain dance too early this time round…I reckon it will not last to the weekend.
Apologies for absence! Been busy counting how many exclamation marks Uncle Ron can get in a Safety Fast!race report! We’re lovin it! Why do we all do this!!! Have no plans to upset anyone ever! Not even the scrutineer who is compiling a photo dossier! Not least at MG Clive!
Just a thought!!! Will the SFO MG/Rover enquiry include how LHD gets so many driver of the day awards!?! We should be told!
Apparently it’s only position 1/2 & 3 finishers that count…the other groups are’nt racing anyone….I seem to remember a spin on the 1st corner at Brands but Safety Farce seem to have missed this?
See you all tomorrow or on sunday.
Pete
Rumour has it that professional motorsport journalists sit in air conditioned comfort and write the race meeting up from the official time sheets and the contents of any commentators sheets submitted, actually watching a race would disrupt the creative atmosphere.
Others say its all written in advance and the motor racing gods ensure it comes to pass…..
All I know is Jonesey will die of embarrassment if he’s mentioned in SF.
The chances of SF being so short of copy that they resort to mentioning me is so remote that I will just have to continue to let my lack of driving skills embarrass me instead.
We have quite a few spare tickets if anyone needs any, I will be there from tomorrow afternoon!